It's been a little while since I wrote a post and I thought I would write about something that happens to me from time to time and thought maybe some of you experience this as well.
Have you ever found yourself driving along and a song comes on the radio or iTunes and you just lose it? Yep. It happens. And it's okay. Let it happen. I used to try to change the song so I wouldn't be ugly crying in my car. Now, I am fully embracing the car cry. And it feels so good.
This past year has been a year of tremendous growth emotionally and spiritually. I feel like my emotions are ever present and always changing. I am more in touch with my emotions and I am allowing myself to feel them fully when they arise and change. I probably experience 12 different emotions before I even have my first cup of tea. The great thing about emotions is that they don't last for long. Whether the emotion is "good" or "bad" is irrelevant, what is important is that you breathe through them. When I do this I find I don't stay stuck in the sad emotions too long anymore.
One of my favorite spiritual leaders is Gabby Bernstein. She always talks about the book "A Course In Miracles," which I have yet to tackle. One of the strategies she mentions when emotions arise is to just breathe into them. Breathe into them for 90 seconds and see what happens. Today, before I left to go to my CoreBooty Works class I heard "This Woman's Work" by Kate Bush. If you've heard this song, you know what I'm talking about here. I heard it last week too while I was watching "A Handmaid's Tale." I won't ruin it by telling you what happens in that first episode, but trust me that song had tears streaming down my face. The same thing happened this morning after I had already put on my mascara. But instead of running over to my computer to change the song, I let it play and I let the pain in my heart come out.
I have found that when I am more present in my day I can experience emotions as they happen and not have to stuff them down to experience later. I have been known to start welling up with tears in the middle of conversations. Tears of happiness and sorrow are now welcomed into my life.
I have always been an emotional person, but it seems like some of my emotions don't show up as often as they used to. Like frustration, worry, and anger. Learning how to manage "negative" emotions has been the key for me to feel happier more often. When I face feelings of frustration and anger, my first thought becomes compassion. Why am I feeling angry or frustrated toward this person or situation? Next, I give myself compassion for feeling this way. Then, I extend my compassion to the other person. Maybe they are having a hard day, maybe they received some bad news, or perhaps they are experiencing a "bad" emotion and they don't know how to get unstuck from it.
So, my advice is this: When the emotions come, let them. Next, breathe into the emotion. Let the emotion arise and then fall away. Unexperienced emotions will only come back to bite you in the butt, really, really hard. I've learned it is not healthy to resist and stuff away the emotions. We tend to do other things to not experience the emotions like shop, overeat, have sex with the wrong people, and neglect ourselves because we feel shame. Then, ask yourself why you are feeling that emotion. Next, be compassionate toward yourself and then extend the compassion to the other person if they triggered the negative emotion.
Once you become more aware of your emotions and their triggers for the negative emotions, the less you will feel compelled to wallow in those "bad" emotions. And before you know it, you'll be walking on sunshine all day long!!! Just kidding!! But maybe? These are just some of the tools I use now. Hopefully, they can help you too. Let me know if this works for you or if you want to share what you do to get over negative feelings.
Until next time, Beauties! xoxo